I think we have all felt this way, ladies.
When we are dating a guy that we like we often wonder what the other people in his life will think. We often times wonder what he has told his parents and his friends about us. I mean it’s a scary thought but when you are dating that special guy you are not just dating him but you are dating his entire life, both past and present.
Say for example you and him have been going out for a few months and he than precedes to tell you that he wants you to meet a few of his friends. Now that can be daunting thing. I mean the family and friends that are in his life are a big deal for him. I mean we are talking about meeting those who are closest to him and that know him best. It’s not to say that you don’t know him, but when you are family that is the center of an individual’s life. Family and close friends will do what they have to in order to protect him. It’s just the way it is.
Meeting the family: Will they like me?
When you go an meet the friends for the first time there are probably many questions that will be plaguing you. One of them could be “Will they like me?” Another one could be “What has he told them about me?” I mean ladies let’s be real here; yes we talk to our friend about the guys we are dating, but let me tell you something, guys do the same thing. We would be fools and liars to think that they didn’t. So they will have already prefaced you to their friends even before you have met. And I’m not saying this to intimidate you, it’s just the reality of the situation. And after they have accepted you where do you go from here? Once the friends have entered the picture is it still just the two of you? Or has the two of you ceased to exist?
What about the family?
What about when the time comes to meet his family? The same rules apply just in different way.
Let’s say that the two of you have surpassed the “whole meeting of the family and friends” and you guys are becoming very serous. Well now comes the question that every woman wants to know. Am I still dating him and only him? Well to be perfectly honest, no, not really. I mean yes it is just the two of you. Now the family and friends are involved too.
A family has a way of etching themselves into your lives, even where they shouldn’t be. They have a way of nosing around where they are not needed. It happens ladies, whether we want to admit it or not. In some ways their nosing around can be a good thing and at the opposite side a bad thing.
It’s equal parts positive and negative.
A family has its own agenda when it comes to relationships. Many members, and a great deal of them women, wish for you to become a parent as soon as possible. I mean even before you have set the date you are already barefoot and pregnant. Now what does that tell you? What if that is not part of your plan? What if you and him have something different planned? Once you become part of the family is the idea of “just the two of you” the thing that gets sacrificed? What about your relationship still stays behind closed doors?
When he invites you into his private world of family and friends, is your privacy the one that is getting sacrificed?